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By z4029250730, Dec 17 2016 07:46PM

Try to discipline your mind to think and dwell on what is good and positive every day before you even get out of bed. Do not entertain negative thoughts or any thoughts starting with "what if..." or "if only..."

Let your friends and family know what they mean to you and how much you care about them. Give something out in the way of appreciation, compliments and love rather than wanting to receive or being self-centred. Be a 'Sea of Galilee' rather than a 'Dead Sea' ie. give out rather than just soak up.

Live for today and rejoice in today. Rejoice and be happy that you are alive and have some - if not all - of your five senses.

Forget the past and stop dwelling on it and in it. It is over - you can't change it. You can only - to the best of your ability - deal with now and today.

Find ways to increase the amount of exercise you get even if it's only in small increments. Try and be creative with it and ideally make it fun and sociable with others. See it as something to be enjoyed and benefitted from - rather than just a chore or a task.

Contentment is a decision and a discipline. Train your thinking. Give thanks daily for the blessings you have. Look around and be joyful for the potential of your life still. You have so much more than millions, if not billions, of others.

Think of how you can help and encourage others with some extra acts of kindness. Maybe go the extra mile. Random acts of kindness can have a huge affect on others. Reach out to those that need reaching out to. Encourage, write letters and emails, give some online therapy, befriend and help those in need.

Forget the dreams that have crashed and the places and situations where you imagine that things will be better. Stop thinking that things are better somewhere else. They're not! Embrace and make the most of your present situation rather than trying to run away from it.

Get outside and enjoy the natural world. The 'Great Outdoors' is outdoors - You have to actually go and find it. Leave the T.V., the internet, the magazine, the games console, etc. Go and find and enjoy the beauty of the world around us. Cheer yourself up by looking at the beauty of nature.

Stop allowing anxious thoughts to consume you. Lighten up on the details. Be flexible and patient. Rather than worry about, "What if ...happens," turn it around, and say "If ........happens, I will......" and then write down your answers and solutions.

Look out for your neighbours. Take some time and make an effort to get to know those around you. Try and encourage and befriend those that are easily available on your doorstep. You don't have to go far to make new friends.

Get on and try different options but don't fret if they don't work out as you expected. It's not a big deal. Be flexible. Let go of things and just get on with the next thing in a positive way. Persevere. Don't give up.

Take up a new interest. Preferably something that requires you to step out of your comfort zone and extend yourself mentally, socially and maybe even physically. Learn something new to stimulate the old brain cells and get the neurotransmitters working again.

Stop allowing emotions to toss you around. Take control of them. Call them to attention like soldiers and get them in place and in order - not in undisciplined ranks. You are in control and in charge of them - don't let them order and boss you around. Take control and exercise some authority and self-discipline over yourself.

Take some time to be 'mindful' - to reflect, ponder and think how you are doing each day. Not to be introspective or to go 'navel gazing' but to actively think about what changes you can make in your life each day to enable you - and those around you - to have a better quality of life.

Take your eyes off yourself and your problems. You've spent enough time working through the issues of the past. Move on. Get on and live in the joy and thankfulness of what you do have - rather than being miserable about what you don't.

Make a decision to change something that makes you or others unhappy. Something that you know is not productive in your life. Don't put it off until tomorrow or next week. Start now - this morning, afternoon or evening.

On a daily basis Write down three things that happened that day that were good. Reflect briefly on what they were. Can you make them happen more regularly? Were there others? What positive things can you think on - rather than dwelling on mistakes, frustrations, grievances, etc.

Forgive someone. Release your resentment. Let it go. Let go of the bitterness. Be free to MOVE ON with your life.

Make slight adjustments to your diet and drinking habits. More fresh fruit and vegetables. Less sugary or fatty things. Less junk food. Cut back on drinks containing high sugar or high caffeine. Drink more water to 'detox' and flush out your system. More fibre, sprinkle linseed on your breakfast, etc. Less alcohol. What else do you know that is not good for you that you could cut back on?

Seek out those that can encourage, motivate, challenge, coach, mentor or counsel you. If they are not around, then brainstorm ideas on where to find them. Renew old relationships, visit/join a church, join some clubs, do a distant learning courses, through counseling, etc. Any which way you can - but get some help, support and encouragement.

View yourself holistically ie. body, soul and spirit. Are you addressing all these three areas of your life? If not, what could you do to change things in each area?

By z4029250730, Aug 24 2016 03:03PM

Hi. I wanted to briefly broach the subject of anxiety which is a very relevant issue to many nowadays.


Statistically, anxiety affects approx. 16% of the UK population at any one time and young to middle-aged women are the most prone. Generalized Anxiety Disorder affects 2-5% of the UK population but accounts for 30% of the mental health problems in people seen by GP’s. In my work as a GP’s counsellor in Corby at Lakeside Surgery and the two prisons (Wellingborough and Littlehey) where I have counselled, anxiety came up many times. Mixed anxiety and depression is the most common mental health disorder experienced in the UK and it is estimated that one in four of the British population will experience a mental heath problem along these lines. And in my private Kettering counselling practice, I have encountered many clients battling with these issues.


The dictionary definition of anxiety is “an uncomfortable feeling of nervousness or worry about something that is happening or might happen in the future.”Or “something that causes a feeling of fear or worry.” Does that sound familiar to any of the emotions you or I have experienced in the last two or three months – or weeks – or days – or even hours?


It is very common and people have experienced it since the very beginnings of the human race. And it’s not going to go away. Indeed, it could be a phenomema that affects each of us more and more in the future as we each get older - unless we take steps and are careful to guard our thoughts, attitudes and emotions. For some, their mental lives have become mental battlefields.


It is a ‘hidden disability’ as, like so many other mental afflictions, the sufferer doesn’t necessarily present with the issues on the surface – unlike physical disabilities or even other emotional/mental disabilities that can manifest outwardly. Instead the battle with anxiety takes place in the person’s mind – unseen by others including the sufferer’s friends, family, work colleagues, neighbours, fellow club members, church congregational members, etc. Truly a dark struggle in a dark place. I have battled with it myself at times and it is impossible to really describe to someone who hasn’t experienced it for themselves. So empathy is difficult to find sometimes from those who have not been through it.


Common characteristics of anxiety would be what we call ‘catastrophising’ where the worst case scenario is envisaged or ‘ruminating’ where the topic goes round and round the person’s mind without any resolution - producing depair, negative thoughts, fear, hopelessness, sleeplessness, etc. It can be crippling or debilitating and stops the person functioning normally. And friends and family watching feel powerless to do anything to help.


However, all is not lost and there are many things that can be done in the battle against anxiety. Cognitive Behaviourial Thinking/Renewing the Mind/Positive Thinking/Neuro-linguistic Programming – call it what you like – have all been shown to have significant impact on improving one’s mental state in the area of anxiety and fear. Plus, as I explain to many clients, “where there is a fruit, there is a root” Getting to the root of the fear or anxiety – where it came in in the first place – can be crucial to the long-term healing/theraphy. And that can involve counselling, wisdom, memory-recollections, discernment, etc.


So, there is a way forward. As with most things actually. Despite the bleak outlook and the present-day torment. Things can’t always be “fixed” but they can be healed or moved on significantly. That is what I try and do in my Kettering counselling practice. To try and help people find a way forward in the situations they find themselves in. If you would like help – or know of any freinds, family or work colleagues that do – then please feel free to get in touch with me.